for the record I did some flyin & I got plans now. plans that mean I ain't get stuck anymore circlin Logan for hours waiting for people down in the underground to call & tell me if theyre fucking DEAD or not. plans so when theres trouble I can do something. plans that are gonna change shit around here.
dr. lee hung up on me. the shit is going on down there?
don't like this. gotta fix this thing.
aw shit she did NOT hang up on me.
my counselor said I was refusing to open up today. damn straight.
now I’m getting all fucking paranoid, cuz I’m wondering how many people are in on the whole Violet/Goldbug thing? I don’t know anything about my counselor, not even his name. we use code names for security reasons cuz he’s just some volunteer without federal clearance.
but if I’m gonna start suspecting people just cuz I haven’t met them in person, I’d have to suspect M & Gavotte. ain't never seen them, I'm on the roof all the time. & they’re ok.
P.S. my code name is Maverick.
Dr. Lee called to apologize for getting dragged away by Team Evil when we ran into each other at the airport. she said she was gonna be in Boston for awhile & got Bladerunner on Blu-Ray & could she come over & watch it in me. I said no, I was busy with shit. maybe Violet was just fuckin with me but I think I better avoid Dr. Lee. if something happened to her. g-d.
ETA: she sounded disappointed when I said no. well, I got widescreen.
freaking out over the whole fucked up Violet…thing. should I tell somebody? but then what if Violet finds out? like has she got me bugged? how’d she know she could get to me wrt Dr. Lee anyway?
you’d think the spy stuff would be the funnest part of working Black Ops, but actually it scares the shit outta me.
(ok i don't know if i can even talk about this but there is some fucked-up shit going on with Anasigma.)
last night I had the most batshit dream. I was flying all over the country looking for Dr. Lee so I could ask her to marry me. which, yeah, retarded, but it was a dream ok? anyway after flyin around forever havin a buncha random fucked-up adventures I can’t remember now, I finally made it to Dr. Lee’s house, which obviously I’ve never been to irl.
I went inside (I was still a copter but somehow I could fit thru the door lol) & there was this guy on the couch glaring at me. he looked kinda familiar but I couldn’t remember where I’d seen him. he started gettin in my face, wantin to know what I was doin there, & suddenly I realized he was me. I mean me when I was human. Except kinda messed up & stitched together like Unity.
then Dr. Lee came in lookin totally hot. at first she didn’t recognize me, but I told her who I was & I was there to marry her. she laughed & said she was already married to human!me. she said she saved all my body parts from when Anasigma removed my brain & afterward she sewed em together & made a new me out of them. I was like, but he doesn’t have a brain. & she was like, no, but he has a heart. I got pissed at that & said I bet it wasn’t *my* heart, & she said maybe it wasn’t, cuz she had a lot of hearts in her bucket of body parts & they all looked the same.
then the human me jumped up & started yellin at me & tryin to fuck shit up. he ran at me & that’s when I woke up. I have to admit that was one realistic thing about the dream, cuz the human me was an asshole irl too.
so that’s what I dreamed. wtf.
confidential to JY: fuckin climb that like a tree, man.